Lately I feel like I’ve lived life like I’ve been in the main cast of a soap opera. Im sure that sounds weird, but I was texting Jenny the other day and told her about this girl I know who is so sly and been mean to me, tried her luck with Patrick while I was there, has ignored me on purpose (in public) when I’ve said hi, bitched about me behind my back and clearly doesn’t like me. I told Jenny about her recently because she requested to follow me on Instagram which I thought was so strange. Like, wtf is her agenda?! I’ve been nothing but nice to her and she’s made her efforts to freeze me out and make me feel crap. Jenny pointed out that she sounds like an evil side character in a soap opera, and that’s exactly the vibe she has!! It cracked me up so much when she said it and it had me thinking about all the other drama I’ve stumbled into recently that is (alarmingly) a lot like a soap opera plot.
The amount of people that’s tried to come in-between me and Patrick is unreal. Girls I don’t even know and that Patrick isn’t even close with has been rude and weird at parties and tried to be all over Patrick (I trust Patrick 100% so it’s hilarious to see them fail.) And people seem to have vendettas against me and I just don’t know why! Like, I have two neighbours down the road. I’ve been friends with them for years. It’s a little over a year ago that I went down there for drinks and they actually helped me out a lot when I moved house. They were amazing. I have tried to arrange to see them a few times, but it didn’t end up suiting any of us and recently I met them by chance down the road and I said “oh hey” all happy and only one of them responded with a short and stern “hi” and turned away. I said “how are you?” and she said “good” all short and they both looked away and kept walking. LIKE WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. Let me point out that I have known them for years. But that’s just one good example and representation of so many little things that’s happened here recently. I feel like it’s a country side thing. Everyone is so concerned with what other people get up to. And it’s so soap opera-esque! I imagine that, on TV, the story would stop following me for a bit and the viewer would find out that she just found out that he cheated on her and there was a huge drama there that I wasn’t even aware of and I just got the short “hi” in the middle of their drama.
Never before have this many people tried to get in-between my relationships before. Lately I’ve had to learn to be cautious because people are fake, have agendas, try to get you to tell them things so they can start rumours and all that. I’m not used to that stuff at all. It’s waaaay too soap opera. All the scenarios I’ve used as examples have been about grown up people, by the way. Not teenagers or anything. And then a few of them still view my insta stories and creep on me on purpose afterwards. It’s so hard to wrap my head around why they would do that. One of my friends, Emer, gave me a fantastic advice. She gives people like that serial killer names or horror movie names. So now I do the same. I have one Nannie Doss (a serial killer that killed men with rat poison) and Creepy McCreeperson. It gives the whole situation a more bearable and comical narrative. I’ll just go “hey, there’s Nannie Doss again” and it’s easier to not take them so seriously.
Although I do rise above it all I have to say it’s been really hard to stay standing through it all considering my depression, anxiety and having very few people around me just the last year. It’s a lot easier to talk about now because I actually feel great and have made good, real friends. For a while I felt like every single person I met had some agenda with me instead of just being a nice friend. The thing I’ve told you about girls being all over Patrick in front of me has hurt because I don’t know why anyone wants to target us to come between us. But also I’ve never been hit on by so many inappropriate people who know perfectly well that me and Patrick are together and are happy. Usually guys who are friends with Patrick. I think that’s so fucked up.
Serious shoutout to the real ones. The OGs that have been with me through thick and thin. The ones that go with me to the toilet at parties, the one that gives me the harsh truths, the ones that comfort me when I cry, the ones that don’t judge me when I do something insanely stupid and date dumb guys, the ones that tries their best to make me look good in photos when I ask them to take one of me, the ones who remember what I tell them and send a random text to check in, the ones who listen to my long stories that I don’t realise I’m telling for the second time, the ones that critique my dumb outfits when they’re not on point, the ones that trust me with their embarrassing stories, the ones that make me laugh, the ones that inspire me endlessly with their strength. It’s become so clear who the real ones are. I have seriously never appreciated them more!!